Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
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